Thought for the Day - When in doubt, Lead with Love

When in doubt, lead with love. It's easier on you.

Lead with love, for yourself.

Celebrating Ranjan

It was Ranjan's third anniversary on July 31. Vasu called and asked what we should do. We had no plans but decided to meet anyway. We went to Karafa and had dinner - but over dinner flowed many lovely memories and confessions m conversations about Ranjan. 

Ranjan, me and Vasu - 2012 - Auli 

I think it's a good way to remember. Meet up with the old gang. Ranjan would be happy to join. 

Good one Vasu. We'll continue this.

Thought for the Day - Questions to Ask Before the Big Day

Big match, big day coming up. These are a few questions to ask.

1) Purpose

 Have we got the team purpose clear? (Win)

2) Common goal 

Is everyone clear about the purpose? (Communicate)

3) Process

Is everyone clear about the process?
Has the focus shifted from outcome to process? (Process orientation)

4) Role clarity

Has everyone been told of their roles (what's expected of them in clear terms as in numbers) and told to prepare accordingly? 

Has everyone been told to give their career best performance today?

(Roles)

5) Strategy

Have you analysed your strengths and weaknesses?

 Have the strongest factors, biggest strengths been put upfront - best team, best combination - to get the maximum advantage? 

Are you playing on your strengths? (Or are you worrying about your weaknesses or the opponents strengths?)

(Competitive advantage)

6) Tactics 

 Have all grey areas (weaknesses) been gone through and addressed - areas which could potentially slip up - and plans made to plug those gaps?

Has all doubt, however small, been clearly addressed?

(Adaptability)

7) Group Intelligence

Is everyone in the leadership group in agreement with the plan? If not, have all possibilities been discussed threadbare and addressed until grey areas are covered?

8) Clarity - Courage

Has hope been taken out of the equation? And replaced by plans and processes to follow?

Are we clear about what to do to gain and maintain and drive home the advantage?

(Playing to win vs hoping or playing not to lose)

9) All Together

Does everyone feel confident about what to do and how to go about? 

(Team work)

...

If so, we are ready to go.

Grey areas are areas that we are not clear about. They often show up like a small doubt, something uncomfortable. The wrong person, the wrong tactics, the wrong choices. Such niggling doubts indicate that we are rushing through without clarity, without information. We are hoping it will work out.

 It won't. That's where we will slip up. Spend time on it. Ask the right questions until all doubt is cleared. 

Then, go.

Lovely Talk on the 'Psychology of Winning' Denis Waitley

 It's a lovely talk on the psychology of winners - well prepared, well presented, with humour, stories, experiences, putting himself as an example and well delivered. I made a bunch of points from it but the key is these five principles he puts out. It's a 1987 talk and we can see the innocence of those days come through.

The five principles he talks about are 

1) Self awareness - seeing yourself through others eyes (would others like a partner like me, a team mate like me, a son like  me, an employee like me), break daily routines, meet new people.

2) Self esteem - that deep down feeling of worth/value (internalise your own standard, value, do not compare with others, don't fear rejection, treat failure as learning, learn to take compliments, project value, that feeling that there's no ceiling, take stock, monitor self talk, communicate value))

3) Positive self control - taking control on your life by the choices you make, there's no freedom without responsible action, winners make things happen, you become what you think about, decide to come through (not choke), focus on a fixed outcome, control your time) 

4) Positive self image - set goals because a goal is an image of you in that goal, your goal is how you see yourself, your self talk and self image is important, when you have targets it becomes your dominant thought, goals should be out of reach and not out of sight, get a little better every day, use positive talk like 'what to do instead of what not to do, set goals for all major areas, visualise, learn skills needed)

5) Positive self-expectancy - its self prophecy, you get what you expect, mind over muscle, menu etc, bring on extreme positive, look for opportunities in a crisis, maintain an upbeat outlook, associate with winners, expect the best from others)

Thought for the Day - The Last Three Steps

There is a famous quote that I remember from the movie 'The Walk' in which high wire walker Phillippe Petit (it's his story) says something like - 'most wire walkers die in the final three steps. They think they have arrived but they have not.'

It is true for most things. 

You reach the final, almost reach the end, and take your eyes off the last three steps - with disastrous results. You fall, you lose, you fail. 

The question then is this - why do we take our eyes off the last three steps? 

Most  times it's because we move from process to 'hope'. We 'hope' we will get there without our effort. Instead of keeping our eyes open, being aware and following process we close our eyes and hope. 

Why do we 'hope' in the big moments? The final, the last three steps, the last over.

We hope when we fear looking at reality - at the target, our goal, our desired outcome. The fear of the possibility of losing makes us take our eyes off the target and rely on hope. And when we take our eyes off our target, we miss seeing areas where we can slip up. And that's exactly where we slip up.

A match. A high wire walk. A project. Anything. If we take our eyes off, if we cannot address the grey areas and hope, if we fear losing more than desire winning, we will fall, we will fail, we will lose. 

Like they say, there's many a slip between the cup and the lip. So do not leave important stuff to hope. Keep your eyes open when you get to the last three steps. Hold your fear, force yourself to look at what you want, and go for it with your eyes open.

You might still lose. But at least you have tried to win - not tried not to lose. You have given yourself a fair chance to win. 

Thought for the Day - Why We Escape the Present

Seems like we can't hold the present which is why we run away from it into the past or the future. That way life is always less experienced fully, always vague and cloudy. If the mist goes away, we have to see reality as it is, which we do not want to see perhaps. 

Being present forces us to see things as they are. Being present is about clarity. Being present is not wanting things as we want them to be. Being present is being adaptable to the situation in front of you. 

Scary. Surely.

Easier to fall back on the past and cling on to the known. Easier to hope that things will somehow turn out ok without having to deal with them. Easier to curl up in the cosy blanket of the past, dreaming of stuff.

When we stop running away from the present, we can be present. And when we are present, we can deal with life as it shows up - minus hope, minus clinging to the past - as it is. That's the best way to deal with anything in life. With the clarity of being present. All else falls away except what needs to be addressed and nothing else.

Being present brings clarity to decision making. It makes you aware of what to address and what not to address. It shows the path of least resistance. With the least effort. 

Practice it. Be present. Fully. There's nothing to be scared of.

Curatorial Walk on Indian Miniature Paintings at Salar Jung Museum

On July 25, there was a curatorial walk on Indian Miniature Paintings conducted by Shailka Mishra, Jagdish and Kamla Mittal Museum of Indian Art, Hyderabad. The walk was organised by the Salar Jung Museum and Mukhtyar, who started off as a heritage enthusiast and is now a affable heritage walk leader, sent me the information. I thought I might attend it, Salar Jung Museum is too vast to cover and comprehend in one go and it makes sense to look at sections separately under the guidance of an expert. I asked Anjali if she wanted to come along and she did. Just the museum ticket and nothing else.

We bought the ticket and parked. I could not resist taking a picture of Salar Jung III's statue outside and then his picture inside. At one time this entire length of the road outside the Salar Jung Museum was part of the Dewan Deodi and one wonders how it disintegrated into those small crowded buildings.  

The Salar Jung Museum educational curator Joyoti introduced a small crowd to Shailka who then took us through the miniatures section - starting with the Mughal period miniatures, then Deccani, Pahari, Rajasthani, Malwa and other regions. Some interesting pictures of a wine making process similar to the one we see in Italian movies, one about a boy shooting arrows at a female (wonder why), royal couple listening to music and getting a little cosy etc.

There were portraits of Shahjehan, Jahangir, Akbar, Asaf Jah 1, paintings of scenes, of Krishna, of Hindu Mythology and many others. She pointed out to the work of certain artists who had their unique style.  She conducted the walk fro about 45 minutes and wound up. 

Not too many walk ins. Anjali also wandered off and was later found drinking Pepsi in the canteen. We headed back home after.